Big girls like toys too! Part 4

If there is a Part 4, there are also parts 1-3.  Read em.

Back at it again.  First, my rabbit arrived safely.  I canceled plans with Assclown and went with my intuition that this is something that should be explored alone.

I scrounged around for the FOUR double A batteries my new pet requires.  I meticulously washed the chemical smelling, pink silicone and broke out the lube.

HERE WE GO.  I powered that bad boy up and OMG this thing is scary!  As you increase the intensity of the vibe, the lights on the control panel move up and down like a high tech stimulation meter.

It took a little while for me to get aroused.  I'm just saying, it is difficult to get over the idea of fucking a robot.  There are three controls : one for the 'rabbit ears', one for the vibe on the head of the dildo, and one for the thrusting motion of the dildo.  This is a bit overwhelming.

When I did finally get it there to cum-pletion, the verdict is in.  Yeah, that was fun.  But certainly not by any means a replacement for anything.

Big girls like toys too! Part 3

More toys.  So I ignorantly share with Assclown that I had a male friend over and he was currently washing my dishes and about to take out my garbage like a man with time and the ability to give attention does.  HA!  (This is another story, I'll get there one of these days...)  Anyway, here comes the questions.  Who?  Why?  Are you sleeping with him?
No, no, no.  As long as I am the 'lover' these questions are irrelevant.  Actually, he is cool peoples who happens to enjoy my company, and never fails to bring exotic marijuana to the table.  He fits right in for now, as I am re-exploring my burn-outness.  Assclown now expresses his 'concern' for me and my increasing reefer smoking.  Pssshht.  I don't think so buddy. 

Here come the texts 3 hrs later

AC: I just called you, you didn't answer.  Are you busy?
Oh, now this motherfucker wanna act like he doesn't know me, and how much I despise STUPID questions.  Stupid questions deserve stupid answers.
ME:  (hour later) Yes, as a matter of fact, I am busy.  I was just feeding my pet monkey.

Crickets.

So of course, he is concerned about me having a male friend at the house, and asks to stop by.  How bout later?  "I'm gonna stop at the toy store for goodies..."

Big girls like toys too! Part 2

Read part one HERE.
Of course, Mr. MD Assclown can't let it go down like that.  He could never leave me unsatisfied.  After some work on my behalf, I was able to have him rise back up to the occasion.  I threw him back, and stretched the Double Screaming O cockring over his shaft and balls.  He quivered.  I hopped on top an grinded my way to a quaking orgasm.  It didn't happen immediately, unfortunately.  As I smacked my supple ass back and forth, and tensed my vaginal walls with each thrust, my perky titties ended up in his mouth with each movement forward.  I found myself dreaming about my sexcapade with C.O. and how my mind blowing O came into fruition when he BIT my NIPS!
"Bite my nipples, Baby.  No!  Harder!  I said BITE them, harder!  Harder!"

God, I hate when people can't follow simple directions!


 
He finally nibbled on them with just the right intensity and I blasted off and squirted my honeysuckle juices all over his writhing cock, and he followed suit. Thank you very much.  I loved how the vibes from the ring sent aftershocks of barely tolerant bliss throughout my whole body.

Next stop: Pillow talk
ME: So...why wouldn't you just BITE my fuggin nipples like I begged you to?
AC: Well, I don't wanna hurt you baby, I don't wanna inflict pain.
ME:  Seriously??  MAN UP!  I WANTED that!  Besides, you FUCK me in the ASS don't you?  That is the lamest excuse ever!
AC:  Hahaha true.  Ok baby, you got it.  Ok so we gotta order our next set of toys.
ME: Yes, I want my RABBIT.  ASAP.
AC:  Ok, so your pink rabbit, and I want a good cock ring, that will hopefully prevent me from prematurely blowing my load.  Since it is taking forever for us to find a time to go to the shop together...lets just order online.  You find it, and I will just give you my credit card info.
ME:  Sounds good to me.  I will pay for rush shipping!

Ok, fantastic.  But I wonder if he realizes he is purchasing his replacement?  Also, I wonder how upset he would get if I did a little extra 'me' shopping with his numbers??

Can't wait for my new pet rabbit to arrive.  Big girls love toys too.

Big girls like toys too! Part I

I've mentioned the 'loss of fizzle' in previous posts.  When it comes to anything that excites, it is also likely to disappoint.  I also mentioned my purchase of anal beads and impatient frenzy about them.   I really wanted this to be a good thing. 

Of course, Assclown is DAYS late.  Whole, long, pussy pulsating with intolerant anticipation kind of days.  However, I needed a release, so I graciously accepted the offer of a full body, hot oil rub down and a serendipity orgasm.

He texts me to come to the door.  He hasn't even gotten out of the car yet.  Inconsiderate a-hole.  He meets me on the couch and complements me on my hair.  Aww...but I think its kinda gay he noticed the asymmetrical mastery of my bangs.

Skip the friggin small talk.  Its really overplayed. But I must play nice.




We finally make our way to the bedroom, and I toss him my red satin bag of tricks, complete with my new purchases.  I swear, you could actually see the gleaming excitement radiating from his large hands as he ruffled through the bag and tossed the anal beads on the comforter.  He popped open the package and asked me to go wash it. 

Game on!  We begin to get busy.  He grabs the cherry lube and goes for my ass .  In the heat of the moment, I didn't have the heart to tell him the beads were for HIM.  Part of the excitement fizzled right there.  He pops them in and immediately pulls them out.  Although I'm very stimulated by this point, there wasn't too much to it.  It was kinda, well, blah.  I instruct him to put them back in, then go down on me and pull them out at the very moment of my climax.  He likes this idea.

He slithers down my smooth, milky thighs and flicks his tongue over my throbbing clitoris.  I moan with appreciation.
YES!  I am a lucky bitch.  Mmm I love the way he devours me.
 My back arches.  My quickening pants let him know I'm just about there.  He comes up and mounts me.
Fuck!  I was almost there!
He thruts me deep and completely.  I grind back and begin to release, and here it cummssssss...
BAM!  He pulls out and nuts right on my slit.  I reach down and attempt to rub the juices around my anxious pussy and make my way into oblivion.
Thanks a fucking lot.  For almost nothing.
He grabs a vibe bullet and attempts to bring it out my final blast of wetness.  No can do.  I beg for him to FUCK me.  I mean after all, I could do all the playing with toys shit on my own.  And get it done a lot faster.

AND...he forgot all about the anal beads dangling out of my ass.
I guess its my fault for getting over excited to play with toys.  Kind of like that toy you wanted sooooo bad because it looked so fucking awesome on a commercial, but really was waste of unbiodegradable space.  The excitement fizzled.  And it was beginning to look like the my romance with Mr. Assclown was going to twirl its way down the drain as well.  If he can't even make me explode anymore...

 

WTF Was that?

So after the chicken soup incident, I had no expectations of creating anything special with the law-ya.  I mean, after the first two dates, decent email/text/face to face conversations, and very obvious sparks with the first kiss...the being sent home thing was pretty much all I needed to know.

However, the madness of the holidays only stretched out the inevitable, and he had obvious intentions of getting it poppin, one way or another.  We began to text more regularly and exchanged some pics.  Wow.  Thats all I gotta say.

A little more backround... this guys is A-1 specimen.  He can respect my hustle and struggle as a single mom.  He was raised very similar to how I'm raising my boys.  He clocked basketball scholarships that got him up and out...made it through law school...got him a trophy wife...made some babies...and is now young, sexy and single...and now considering going conquering medical school.  Score.

After the pic exchange, I decided wow, I really want that.  His body was cut.  His bald head smooth.  His long shafted penis gleaming in the token iphone mirror pic that graced my cell screen in my dark, warm bed was very pleasing to the eyes.  I enjoyed...immensely.

Reneged

(Caution: moderately detailed sexcapade below.  Read with caution) 
 
Ok, I reneged my deal to be done with him. But if I didn't, I wouldnt be Mz. Indecisive. Assclown managed to hit me up the day after the Thanksgiving weekend to wish me a happy Thanksgiving.  (Seriously??Assclown?)  BTW...the term 'assclown' comes from the blog "Baggagereclaim" so I must give credit where credit is due.  Anyway, he revealed that he had been dreaming about me and is jonesing to taste me.  Mhm.  Although I am disgusted at his true degree of assclownism...a few texts had me almost creampie in my panties.  The very thought of the naughty things we do had that pussy poppin beyond my control.  Eventually...I agreed to let him come over last night.  He took fuckin forever.  I just wanted to get it over with already.  The anticipation of doing my dumb deed was getting the best of me.

He finally texts me to tell me he was on his way, but wanted to stop somewhere for some flavor lubes.  Pina Colada mmm mmm good my fav.  I was diggin it.  He knows that I just happen to give better than average head, but add in flavor, and it goes to mind blowing.  After stopping at a few stores, and driving by a few that were closed...he finally showed up...with a box of assorted condoms.  Yea.  Note my sarcasm.

So here I've been waiting and ready to go...clothes off, ipod playlist selected, candle lit...and he needs to get in the shower?!?!  Is this the fuckin YMCA?  Don't get me wrong, I appreciate a clean cock...but I was ready at 9am.  I have yet to master the sublime practice of delayed gratification.  I am entirely too impatient.  I should have broken out Mr. Wiggles and did this myself!

So he gets in bed and dives in between my legs like godiva.  YES!  I've been dreaming about this.  I wouldn't allow him to go inside until I had a chance to put my work in...and worship the cock with my mouth.  He seductively asked me to touch myself for his enjoyment.  I graciously complied and could see the appreciation of my actions on his face.

We get it in...but its different than it usually is.  He didn't sex me, stroke me, make love to me or anything along those lines...he fucked me.  He pounded me from every position until my walls were swollen.  Don't get me wrong, I love me some dirty whore sex as much as the next one, and this shit was good...just different from his usual self...and at times it was even a lil awkward. Nonetheless, electrifying and gratifying.  That burning of inner-whoreness finding a short release.     He got it from the back, the nono area...and I had a ground breaking orgasm.  I needed that.  He must have been dreaming about this.  Good, I have been too.  Although I can fantasize and touch myself fondly thinking of any man , it is him and his cock that usually manages to creep into my personal time.

We layed in bed and attempted some empty pillow talk. What is it about this guy that I just can't seem to speak around him?  I generally get pretty far with my witty quips, none of which are evoked by him. Every word that comes out of my mouth when I speak to him is filled with dumb-assness and even some stuttering.   Apparently. the only completely clear message I can send to him is just fuck me.  At that moment, I couldn't see how that previous emotional attachment thing happened and I finally realized, yes this IS and HAS BEEN just sex. Maybe it was the dirty whore sex that brought about that anti-cuddly feeling...if so, thank you sex gods.  I needed that.

Round 2 was a little more typical of us...more sensual and teasing.  I swear my pussy took on a life of its own.  It quivered with every stroke...he must've felt it because he just stopped and layed in it motionless for a while.  Fantastic.  I'm selfish.  I asked him to go back down on me.  I love for my pussy to be worshiped, appreciated in a way only a man who acknowledges the beauty and power of having that sweet juice flow onto his tongue could.  I got all I asked for.

I kept cuddle time to a minimum. After all, we are only fuck buddies, not even friends with benefits. In fact, I've vowed to cut him off time and time again.  We stretched away from each other, fluffed the pillows and slipped into sweet post-coital slumber.  I recall having some crazy dreams which awoke me.  When I did, I realized this motherfucker had put a body pillow in between us.  WTF??  I woke him and asked him wtf is with the barrier between us??  He grabbed the pillow and tossed it.  Seriously though...WTF??  Maybe I farted on him.  Maybe I smacked him.  Maybe I snored in his face...who knows.  But I have to admit, I appreciate the boundary to some extent.

And why why why does Assclown insist upon leaving his shit at my house?!?  Marking territory?  I took pride in tossing his toothbrush into the trashcan this morning. The only thing I want left behind is hot memories of sexcapades past to add to the spank bank.

So, I am undecided.  Can Assclown/Mr.MD remain in my life as my dick in a glass case despite harsh feelings and a broken history??  I'm so excited!  I think I can handle it!